Fude Vol. II- Pork Drunk Ribs

Pork Drunk: The period of mental incapacitation immediately following consumption of large amounts of pork ribs (2 or more slabs + sauce). Pork Drunk is the brief, overwhelming state of euphoric satisfaction before the onset of the sleepiness and lethargy of “the itis”. Pork drunk is what all dudes seek to achieve at Tony Roma’s.

Symptoms: Characterized by an inability to effectively communicate verbally, people who are under the influence of pork often stutter or resort to primitive grunting. Half-chewed rib bits and sauce can often be seen clinging to/ falling out of the infected.

See Also: Pork Flu, The Pork Eye

Example :
Billy: Those ribs were delish, what should we do tonight dudes?
Ian: I think we sh….sh…sh….sh….should………………hhhuggghhhhh
Michael: Dude, did a piece of rib just fall out of your mouth?
Max: Ian has gone pork drunk.
Ian: uggghhhhhh (attempting to nod in approval)

Bearing this definition in mind, Duder offers this week’s recipe:

Pork Drunk Ribs


What you need: (odds are you have most of this stuff in your cupboard)
2 slabs of pork ribs
Dry Rub: Chilli Powder, Brown sugar, Garlic, Salt, Pepper
Braising Liquid: Can of beer, Orange Juice, Soy Sauce

Feeds 2 Hungry Dudes

What I like about this recipe, it only requires (combined) about 10 minutes of actual work. Here’s what to do:

Assemble dry rub in a bowl- about a half a cup of brown sugar, quarter cup of chilli powder, 2 finely chopped cloves of garlic, and lots of salt and pepper.

Rub spice mixture all over both sides of ribs, cover and set those bad boys in the fridge overnight.

Pre-heat oven to 250 degrees. Place ribs in a baking pan with at least a 1-inch lip.

Combine a cup of Orange Juice, a can of beer (coke also works great) and a half cup of soy sauce. If you are using a bigger tray, use more liquid.

Pour liquid into pan with ribs and cover with aluminum foil. Toss in the oven at 250 degrees for 2 hours.

2 hours later grab those slabs of porkflesh and finish them on the barbecue over high heat, for about 4 minutes a side. The goal here is to get some good colour on the flesh side.

Serve with some smoky barbeque sauce and enjoy that shit. Guaranteed dynamite. Seriously, the best ribs you can have with virtually no effort.


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